Looking West

Went to my first party IN AFRICA. Not bad for day 4, I suppose. The expat community here is huge, & say what you will about neglecting the locals for the comforting familiarity of English-speaking Caucasians, this group is probably even more diverse than all of eastern Africa. I met 5 United States Marines – one of them was wearing a shirt that said “PUSSY” & upon entering the premises, bellowed “LET’S GET FUCKED UP!!!!” I was delighted. Also met a South African hip-hop producer with the most beautiful accent I have ever heard. He owns a studio here & works with a musician who plays breath-powered vodka-bottle flutes & raps in French about debt relief. Yeah.

Also met a Norwegian radio journalist & another Norwegian ex-military scuba diver. He was drinking cider at the bar around the corner from my house & was assaulted because large South African men think cider means you are a homosexual. Also, it is impossible to tell when someone is Norwegian. Be very careful.

Finally, I met a girl who went to Duke. She said, “Oh, you’re from UNC, we were thinking of not letting you in [lololl]!” And then I was like, “slooaj” & then I died.

Then there was sangria & that Kelis song about milkshakes. Also, I was solicited by prostitutes.

I said no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~ by lookwest on February 16, 2007.